I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
Randomize
