So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
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