She's JV to your varsity
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
Randomize