Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
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