And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
Mike is offhisass drunk and just sat down next to my sister and said "If you gained 30 pounds and stopped reading poetry, I would be attracted to you. Now, your little sister, attractive, even though she's basically the same person as you- she just pulls it off better because she's 15."
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
Randomize
