Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Randomize
