Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
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