I didn't shave. On purpose
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
Randomize
