Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
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