haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
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