i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
