I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize
