It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
