So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize
