I puked a lego.
went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Randomize
