Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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