Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
You need Xanax blowdarts
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
Randomize
