It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
