Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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