what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
