Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
