IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
Randomize
