Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Randomize
