she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
Randomize
