Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
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