i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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