Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
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