I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Randomize
