i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Randomize
