We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
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