I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Randomize
