I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
Randomize
