i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
Randomize
