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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
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