yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
Every time I type "should" my phone autocorrects to "shouldn't". even my phone knows my ideas are terrible.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
