You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
Randomize
