is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
Randomize
