Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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