i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
Randomize