Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
Randomize