I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
