Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
