oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
i need an iv and a liver transplant
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
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