I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I fell asleep in my underwear on the deck. What the fuck.
This was the best text I've ever woken up to
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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