my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
I miss vodka workout Fridays
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
Randomize
