we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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