I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Randomize
