we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
lol hangovers are for mortals.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
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