Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Randomize
