I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
Randomize
